


Life Cycles

by deadbattery



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: I don't know, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-22
Updated: 2014-02-01
Packaged: 2017-12-15 19:04:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/852985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadbattery/pseuds/deadbattery
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>"Ice tea imported from England,"</i><br/> </p>
<p>  <i>"I'm going to punch you in the throat."</i><br/> </p>
<p>  <i>"Life guards imported from Spain-" Harry throws his pencil at him.<i></i></i></p>
<p> <br/>Or Harry has a shitty new summer job in the filing office of boredom and Louis makes it interesting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. showtunes and staples

Their new boss, leaving them standing alone in the small and dark filing room, slammed the door shut behind them. So far Harry’s expectations of his new summer job aren’t being met; he’s currently been loaded off to staple and copy and file boring documents for hours until he can go home. Not to mention he’s not alone. The other new employee is called Louis and he's apparently a few years older than Harry despite his small size, he’s ridiculously attractive too.

Harry really didn't want to develop any attraction towards whoever he was going to be working with, but as soon as he clapped eyes on Louis he knew he was figuratively screwed. He supposes there's some sort of rule about dating co-workers which sucks. He wants Louis to suck his dick. 

Louis flips on the lights, the harsh brightness nearly blinding them both like the vampires they obviously are. The older boy shoves his bag under the table before wandering over to the stack of folders labelled "to sort" and laughs.

Harry frowns, "Not funny, this is total bullshit."

The other keeps laughing and turns around to face Harry, fuck he looks even better when he's smiling. "Oh?" He asks between chuckles.

He is honestly worried about this guy's mental health, "Er yeah.. this sucks," he wonders if it's too late to get paired with that irish kid who got sent to the coffee room.

Louis stops laughing and now looks almost serious, "C'mon. We can totally turn this thing around." Well shit, Harry has reached the peak of his life; nothing can ever top this.

"You're shitting me." He states. Louis' expression doesn't waver.

"We've got to work, work, work this out." He chants.

Harry throws his bag on the floor, "Jesus fuck, shut up."

Louis cackles, "Eloquent for a little dude!" He turns around again and takes half of the pile before Harry can get him in a headlock, or snog him, he hasn't decided.

He takes the remaining half of the stack and starts to sort through the various papers whilst sat at the table, careful not to kick Louis' bag, which has a large smiley face badge attached to it that says "don't punch me i'm famous". Louis however has decided to sort his own share on the floor, leaning against the water cooler. Harry hopes it falls on him, for either a wet t-shirt kink or to cause him bodily harm.

They chat for the first half hour about trivial information such as favourite things, last names and cock sizes. He learns that Louis likes to write poetry about death and he has a collection candy stick cards dating back to 1995. He tells the boy about his family and how he caught his last boyfriend balls deep in the local drugdealer (most people would have laughed but Louis was genuinely sad for him). Harry boasts a little about how he is friends with an actual radio 1 DJ and Louis has a wicked grin on his face as he tells him, which kind of unsettles Harry.

He finds Louis very interesting, he has the ability to make the menial tasks they're both doing not completely boring. Harry is thankful for that. 

It's not so bad, he thinks, to be stuck doing this shitty underpaid and slave-like job if the older boy is there to entertain him and provide him with some truly excellent wank bank material.

They work in silence for about 40 minutes after the conversation dwindles, well when he says silence, the sound of the large clock ticking is getting on his tits along with the occasional cheerful whistle from the boy on the floor. He's imagining scenarios that involve a cheese grater and Louis' ass when he knows he will inevitably go insane working here all summer. He now knows that since they're just the worker monkeys, it isn't necessary for him to wear smart clothes for work. He is so coming to work tomorrow naked.

After the first hour he's so fucking bored, Louis even stopped whistling and the fucker is almost done with his pile, meaning he will finish before Harry. Not fair. Harry bets it's those tiny hands that get the job done so quickly, he should swap his sasquatch paws for those.

The silence breaks when Louis has been finished for all of 5 minutes.

"Ice tea imported from England,"

"I'm going to punch you in the throat."

"Life guards imported from Spain-" Harry throws his pencil at him.

 

It's almost 3pm and Harry is finished. He slams the last drawer shut and goes over to where Louis is lying on the carpet wiggling his bum slightly to an imaginary beat. He collapses next to the other, who stops moving his body.

"Why are you working here?" He asks Louis.

Louis doesn't answer him for a moment, instead he puts his hand in his pocket and pulls out a wrapped sweet and hands it to Harry who takes it without question. It'd be fun if it was drugs. Maybe Louis is a drug dealer, that would be swell.

"I don't know Harry, maybe I thought it could be the start of something new." He smirks, actually smirks, the bastard.

"Stop." Harry might actually impale himself on one of those sharp pencils if he hears another high school musical reference come out of that obscene mouth that Harry would much rather be kissing. 

He glances over at the older boy who now has his eyes closed, which is a shame because Harry had noticed earlier that they were his (new) favourite shade of blue. He really hopes Louis is gay, because he would very much like to ask him to get coffee. 

"Can I have your number?" He asks, going for bold and brash but coming out as timid and shy. Why.

He hears Louis snort from next to him, "You can get it from Nick Grimshaw." He starts giggling and brings his hand up to his mouth to try and stifle his laughter.

Holy mother mary of God, Harry thinks at the sight of Louis Tomlinson giggling on the floor next to him. His brain soon catches up to his ears, "Wait, what? You know Grimmy?" He asks, because if so, he is going to have stern words with Nick later for not introducing him to this beautiful little weirdo before he had to meet him himself.

"My name is Louis."

"I know?" Harry is confused, he would really like to go home now.

"Your name is Harry."

He might actually cry, "No my name is Shrek, I think you must of misheard."

Louis nods apologetically, "I have been having some difficulty with my hearing lately, Zayn was screaming my name and I barely heard him ya know?"

Tears are the best solution, "Why was Zayn screaming your name?" Harry asks sadly.

Before the older boy can answer, they both snap their heads up at the sound of approaching footsteps. Harry springs to his feet and turns around to help Louis scramble up. Hurrying over to the filing cabinet and flinging a drawer open at random so as to appear busy and very much consumed in their interesting work. The door opens and a boy with semi-shaved head and is wearing a red suit with green trainers, he looks frantic yet strangely excited. His eyes land on Louis who is beaming. Harry is bewildered, yet relieved it isn't their new boss who might have heard Harry's dirty thoughts from upstairs.

"Louis."

"Liam."

"Harry." He says, because why the fuck not.

They both ignore him, rude. "Am I allowed to leave?" Louis asks the boy called Liam. Harry shakes his head, which Louis sees and then pouts.

"Yes you are!" Liam exclaims, "I spoke to the big dude upstairs-"

"God?" Harry asks.

"-and he says it's fine as long as it's a family emergency." Louis claps his hands in delight, apparently he's going to leave Harry to fill the next hour on his own in boredom because he needs to go with the guy in the garish suit. Brilliant. He grabs his bag from under the table, waltzes over to where Liam is stood in the doorway and turns round to say bye to Harry.

"Excellent, goodbye Shrek."

Liam pauses in leaving, "Shrek? Like the ogre?"

Louis nods fervently, "Yes! He looks like it doesn't he?" Harry is offended.

"Like a monster yes?" Liam asks Louis. That guy is taller than Louis too, poor guy must hate being shorter than everyone. 

The pair stood by the door look each other in the eyes before looking over at Harry and announce simultaneously, "Monster dick." Before walking out the door, leaving it to swing limply shut with Harry staring after them with admiration and a partial amount of glee.

He's so glad he applied for this job.


	2. wanks and weirdness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis continues to make Harry's new summer job more interesting than it should be.

For once in his life, Harry is actually excited to go to work; he wakes up before his alarm, has a pleasant wank in the shower and gets dressed. He supposes that he doesn’t exactly have to dress to impress, but a little effort can go a long way with lining up a potential date. Harry is very glad that he doesn’t have to wear a suit and tie everyday because that just gives him school flashbacks.  
He idly wonders as he’s putting on socks, if Louis actually goes on dates because he genuinely cannot imagine that boy sitting still for that long. 

Also, now that he’s on the subject of Louis (not that he wasn’t in the shower earlier) he wants to know what was up with the guy in the red suit and the supposed “family emergency”. 

He’s not nosey, just incredible curious.

 

\--

 

“Harry Styles?”

He turns around before going into his prison cell/work station, the blonde Irish guy from upstairs is staring at him.

“Yeah?”

“Hey mate, I’m Niall. I need to help you until lunch today!” Harry likes his accent. He grins at Niall, it’ll be nice to know someone here that isn’t insane. He’d like to give him a full psychiatric test to make sure though before he exchanges numbers and addresses. 

“Yeah? That’ll be great, me and Louis could use the help.” 

Niall frowns, “Louis? He’s the guy I’m filling in for so I doubt he’d be that chuffed I was here.” 

Harry sighs sadly, he got up early for nothing because Louis won’t be in until after lunch. “Oh.” 

Niall lets out a startled laugh, “You ain’t a picture either princess!” Harry snorts in surprise, he smiles fondly. 

“Alright c’mon, let me show you the palace.” He waves his hands dramatically and Niall just stares at him. “What?”

The other boy just shrugs and smirks a little, “nothin’ just very camp.” He explains, Harry schools his features to look affronted.

“I’ll have you know that I’m as hardcore as they come, I eat metal and wood for breakfast!” 

“I bet you eat wood.” Niall waggles his eyebrows ridiculously.

Harry facepalms, “You’ve known me for like 1 minute and you’re already being inappropriate. I like you.”

Niall laughs and follows him into the filing room.

 

\--

 

Harry likes Niall, he doesn’t make any high school musical references or bad puns. He’s learnt that Niall has a dog called ‘grump’ and a girlfriend called Chiyo, who is on a worker exchange programme from Japan and that their relationship is purely at the animalistic sex stage.

When Niall leaves at 12 to go back to the coffee room, Harry decides to ring Grimmy and ask him how he knows Louis. He takes so long to answer the phone that Harry was almost sure he was going to get the answering machine.

“Ello?” He sounds sleepy.

“Grimmy, how does Louis know you?”

He hears a poorly stifled yawn on the other end, “Tomlinson?”

“Yes.”

“We’ve fucked a few times, attempted to make a sex tape but it went wrong when he got cum on the film. Now we’re just mates.” He can almost hear the shrug.

Harry lets that sink in; his best mate used to have sex with the guy he’s got a crush on.. awesome. “So you were never serious?” 

Nick sighs, “No Harry, why?”

“Well erm I wanted to ask him out. He’s working in the same room as me and he’s really cute and oh my god he’s so tiny but he’s kind of crazy and that worries me because what if we have sex and he does something really unpredictable like shove foliage up my bum or something and-“ he’s breathing heavily.

Nick is laughing, “I think he’d prefer you to stick the foliage up _his _arse, but regardless, stick something sanitary up there. So not your penis- heavens knows where that thing has been!” Harry grumbles, “Joking Harold, simmer down. I dunno just ask him out for a milkshake because he doesn’t like coffee.”__

Harry is nodding even though Nick can’t hear him, “Oh alright, can I have his number?” He writes the number down on his hand whilst Nick reads out the digits.

“Thanks Grimmy!”

“No problem, I’m going to sleep now. Go shag him on a filing cabinet or something you little exhibitionist you.”

Harry hangs up on him.

 

\---

 

His head snaps up from it’s resting place on the table when the door swings open and Louis walks in looking absolutely shattered yet still gorgeous.

“Good morning!” He chirps. 

“Or Bore Da as the welsh say,” Harry mutters weakly because Louis’ jeans are bright and very tight. He’s having trouble breathing at this particular moment.

Louis smiles at his linguistic input, before sauntering over to sit down opposite Harry. “Work. Right. Okay. What am I doing at this job?” He asks confusedly.

Harry quirks an eyebrow, “Filing. How many jobs do you have?”

“Three I think, wait no four, I forgot about the one at that strip joint.”

“Which one?”

“Tat no tit.” Harry smiles, he likes that one. 

He hums in approval and watches as Louis gets up and potters over to the cabinet to get them both a fresh stack of files. “So what was the emergency yesterday, if you don’t mind me asking?” He tacks on as an afterthought, even though he would ask anyway because he loves to pry into people’s personal lives.

Louis laughs, “Not an emergency, that was just what Liam told the boss. I was needed because my other friend Zayn was having a party at this ice skating rink and then we all went back to our place, but the police ended up coming round due to noise complaints or something.”

“Did the party get shut down?”

“Nah, Zayn took two of them up to his bedroom and the lady ended up doing shots off Liam’s torso. It was a good night I guess.” He does a one-shouldered shrug as though this sort of thing happens to him all the time. Then again it might. It sounds like the sort of lifestyle that Harry wouldn’t honestly mind being caught up in.

“Why wasn’t I invited?” He asks as he punches holes in a personal statement. He looks up when Louis doesn’t answer, the older boy is looking at him inquisitively. His eyes look shiny. 

“Do you have my number yet?” Louis asks instead of answering Harry’s question. He nods because he might as well tell the truth. He hadn’t wasted much time in acquiring it from Grimmy, he hopes his eagerness isn’t creepy. “That’s good,” Louis nods jerkily, “hey wanna hear a sadistic joke?”

Harry blanches and clears his throat, “Sure, why the fuck not!” He swears he’s going to get whiplash every time he has a fucking conversation with this guy. He is seriously considering bringing a neck brace to work tomorrow to prevent further injury.

“Did you ever hear about the girl called Sarah who fell off the swing and lost both her arms?” Louis asked, grinning.

Harry shakes his head because he thinks speech is beyond him right now.

“Knock knock.”

Oh he knows how to respond to that, “Who’s there?”

Louis smiles wickedly, “Not Sarah.” Harry stares at the other in complete disbelief, he doesn’t know what he was expecting; after all, Louis did say it was sadistic. He’d really like some sane company now though. He’ll ask him out later. He stands up to go find Niall or someone, Louis pouts.

“Where are you going?” He looks all forlorn and Harry just wants to scoop him up into his arms and maybe coo a little.

“Stretch my legs.”

Louis springs up from his seat, “Me too!” He starts walking around the room in circles, “D’ya think we get paid extra for exercising?” 

Harry leaves the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> apparently you can now find me on tumblr as tomlinshoo because i wanted a change yeah


	3. Flight or Fart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis continues to make Harry's new summer job more interesting than it should be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorryyyyyy this took so long omg. I got reminded of this story's existence so thank you to that kind soul. Enjoy.

It’s the third week of working as a menial slave for this stupid company when Harry finds himself seriously evaluating his sanity and life choices. Louis is being quiet today and Harry sort of misses his loud and obnoxious mannerisms, which is what leads to the epiphany of his sanity; how can Harry be working in such a shit summer job and actually feel sad when his little psychopathic partner is acting subdued? There aren’t any voices in his head to answer, which is kind of a good thing really. But still, the help would’ve been nice.

He resolves to be nosey about Louis’ life again.

“Hey Lou why so quiet?” He asks cheekily.

Louis looks up from where he was sat on the floor staring at a label on a folder, “What?” he replies dazedly.

Harry frowns, this isn’t the Louis he’s used to, “Just seeing if you’re ok?”

It’s astounding how quickly Louis rearranges his expression into a grin, “I’m dapper, how about you? Your curls seem a bit flat, deflated almost. That must be a sign of an unsatisfying sex life if I’m not mistaken.” 

“Seriously? Nah I think I just slept on them funny- wait you’re dodging the subject!” Harry scowls, his sex life is actually at a dry spell right now but that cannot be apparent from his hair. That’s just ridiculous. 

Louis bites his lip for a moment and his eyes roam over Harry’s body from where he’s sat until he gracefully gets up. “I’m an expert at that. Had an intervention and everything.” 

“What?”

Making a displeased sound, Louis reaches up on his toes to plant a kiss on Harry’s cheek, “Thank you for asking why I’m quiet, would you believe me if I said it was a social experiment?”

Still bewildered from the kiss and reeling from the feel of Louis’ soft lips against his skin, harry stutters out “the fuck.”

“To see if you cared. I proved that I am irresistible, since we have been acquaintances for just three weeks yet you already care enough to ask. It’s charming truly.” Louis’ smile turns into a grimace then, “I need to go.” 

“No. I mean. Why?” Nice save, Harry.

“Family emergency?” Louis actually sounds sheepish for the first time.

Harry shakes his head, “That’s not gonna fly Lou, you can’t use that this time. Plus if you leave I’ll have to deal with Niall for another two hours!”

“Niall’s a hoot!” 

“Louis.”

Louis sighs, it’s a weary long-suffering kind of sigh, it makes Harry feel young and kind of creeped out by the impression Louis has had a long sufferance “It’s my anniversary with Drew.”

Harry thinks his heart might be crying into his kidneys or something, because Louis has a boyfriend. “Oh. Cool have fun.” He tries not to sound too bitter.

“I wont though?” Louis looks down at his ridiculous footwear, honestly VANS with no socks in this weather.

“Why not? I bet anniversaries are great! What’s the milestone?” The faux excitement doesn’t come easy but it’s manageable.

“It’s complicated. Much like the enigma that is how Niall’s hair remains at that perfect balance of blonde with brown roots. Incredible.” Louis is quick and witty and he thinks this is the Louis that is ‘irresistible’ because it’s so endearing even when he’s trying to avoid Harry’s question. It’s quite impressive really and Harry might have to ask him at some point to teach him the art of avoidance. Right now there are more pressing matters and Louis seems to still be rambling about Niall’s hair while Harry was having an internal monologue.

“It can’t be natural that’s just bullshi-“

“Louis!” Harry says loudly, cutting off the babbling.

Louis looks up at him startled and steps away from Harry very quickly, backing away until his back hits the filing cabinet. He’s breathing hard, it’s concerning. Harry goes to move towards him but Louis holds up a hand to halt his advancement.

“Don’t. Sorry, just being silly. Give me a minute.” 

Harry stays resolutely still while Louis calms himself down with some sort of breathing technique. Once his breathing is slowing down he shakes his limbs a little, it’s bizarre. Everything that has happened is just weird. Harry wants to go to bed and sleep for about ten years to recover from a conversation with Louis.

He’s not sure that that’s a normal reaction. He blames Louis.

“Ok I’m good. I’ll be off now then?” Louis is smiling at him and he has that glint in his eyes again, causing Harry to narrow his own.

“What was that?”

“What was what?” Louis asks dumbly. 

“The whole ‘I have to go’ thing and then freaking out when I raise my voice?” Harry demands to know, if not he won’t be able to sleep. He feels distinctly wrong-footed and he hates it.

“I will tell you if you actually texted me for once god damn.” Louis says.

Harry’s mouth opens and closes a few times before he finds his voice “You want me to text you?” He asks happily.

“Well duh. That’s why I allowed Nick to give you my phone number idiot.” Louis is grinning mischievously again. It’s a thing.

“Oh. Wait you spoke to Grimmy?” 

“Yeah he’s one of my best friends. I’m sure he’s already told you that we shagged before deciding to be friends after the disastrous sex tape escapade, and I assure you that it was him who got the cum on the tape. Not me. Though I wouldn’t have minded having a copy of that tape, it was a great night once we’d stopped laughing.” Harry really does not need Louis reminiscing about his past sexual endeavors right now and it must show on his face because Louis starts giggling.

“That is a lovely mental image I thank you kind sir. But seriously, I’m glad that you told Grimmy to give me your number. I will text you and we can talk yeah?” Harry asks seriously, because he really wants to know what’s got Louis so worked up.

“Mmmkay. Dope. Swag etcetera,” Louis replies as he turns away from Harry to gather up his stupid bag and his bright yellow parka. Once he’s ready to leave he turns to face Harry again. “You should definitely text me after 9pm tonight” he says smiling.

“Deal. Enjoy your anniversary!” 

“Dude, I won’t. I expect there will be unsatisfactory sex and limp noodles all around-“ all around? How many people is Louis going to be having sex with tonight, Harry wonders “- and I will probably see you tomorrow with flat hair to match yours!”

“Hey you never know, I could be bald tomorrow and force you to join me in solitude.” 

Louis glares at him murderously, “too far Harold. Too far. “ and making a throat cutting motion at him before turning round to leave. 

Harry waves him off and ogles his cute little butt as he saunters out the room humming that popular song about letting shit go from ‘Frozen’ and off down the corridor. When Louis turns the corner, Harry lets the door swing shut and he lets out a strangled yell because he’s sexually frustrated and no one will hear him since him and Louis work in the fiery hell pits of this office building.

He lets out a long sigh, similar to the one Louis let out earlier and plonks himself down in the empty chair to finish his work. 

 

\--

 

Harry is summoned back to consciousness by something prodding his neck, he allows this poking to continue for a moment before sitting up and looking around, he is still sat at the table at work. How unfortunate. Also, Niall is staring at him.

“Harry what’s happening?” Niall asks him worriedly.

“What?” it isn’t that uncommon to fall asleep whilst completing mind-numblingly boring work, why is Niall so confused.

“You were sleeping and talking- sleep talking yeah.” 

“Oh” Harry can’t even remember what he was dreaming about, “What was I saying?” a dangerous inquiry, but one he is compelled to make.

Niall smirks wickedly down at him, “You were mumbling about shoving various things up Louis’ arse. Also I think you’re hard.” 

Harry looks down. Shit. He has an erection at work. He thinks that this must be an all time low, which consequently happens to be one of Louis’ favourite bands. Oh the irony. “Erm. Well yes but clearly I was enjoying myself so why did you wake me up?” Honestly Harry is too tired to be embarrassed about his mid-afternoon wood.

“Because it’s time for you to clear off?” Niall looks worried again, “I thought you’d have gone by now.”

“Then why did you come down here?” He asks.

“I always come down here when you and Louis have gone so I can have a fart.” Niall shrugs.

“You come down here to fart after hours?” Harry asks to make sure he heard correctly.

“Yup. Fart freedom and whatnot. It was Louis’ idea after I told him about my internal struggle, get it? Internal?” Niall starts cackling at his own joke. Harry really wants to go home now and mentally prepare himself to text Louis tonight because he has no idea what a conversation starter with Louis Tomlinson could possibly be. Possibly something from ’10 interesting facts you didn’t know about a cat’s digestive system.’

“Of course it was his idea. I have to go home now.” Harry grabs his bag off the hook and makes his way over to the door.

“I have to fart now. See you tomorrow!” Niall waves at him and then starts making an odd groaning sound that indicates Harry should leave.

“Bye.” 

He’s rushing off down the corridor and towards the lift quickly in case Niall’s toxic fumes creep up behind him and chase him home. He’s waiting for the lift and thinking about possible opening lines to use on Louis to ensnare the lad and get him to agree to meeting up outside of work when it dawns on him.

Is Drew a boy or a girl?

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr at crumpetlouis


End file.
